“Dear Cocoa,
I am writing this
letter to you from the cold, wet, dreary outside. I am hiding under some big thing that roars
to life every now and then to try to stay dry.
I am cold, hungry, and frightened.
Two days ago I was warm, dry, well-fed and pampered; but then my pets
decided they were in control and tossed me out when I tried to share their
meal. What can I do to get back into my
home where it is warm, dry, and comfy?
Signed Cold and Wet”
“Dear Cold and Wet,
 |
| Brrrrrrrrr |
Ohhhh, you do have a
problem, don’t you? Pets will, on
occasion, feel they are superior and try to rule your life. When this happens, trying to force your way
back in just makes them feel their superiority much more. Instead, ply on their sympathies. Sit on the step or in the window, somewhere
they can see you. Make sure you are
soaking wet and look pitiful. Cry and
tap the window often. Lie down in the
rain and keep looking inside. It won’t
be long before your pets will reconsider and let you back into their home.
PS: if this doesn’t work by the time the sun goes
to sleep, you might want to find a warm hidey-hole and reconsider if you want
these people for your pets. Anyone who
doesn’t let their lord and master in out of the wet and cold doesn’t really
deserve us, don’t you think?
Signed Cocoa”
