"Dear Cocoa,

My pet seems to be having a bit of a problem.  She won't pet me or pay any attention to me at all.  I have gone over all of my actions for the last few days:  climbing the curtains, knocking over her lamp, leaving a present on her pillow, racing across the table filled with food, snatching bits off their plates when they weren't looking, trying her coffee and liking it; you know, typical cat stuff.  Has she gotten sick or something?

Signed Worried"

"Dear Worried,

You have nothing to fear.  Your pet is simply going through a 'faze' and will return to normal in a few days.  In the meantime, find a warm cubby somewhere out of the way and get some much needed rest.  Things will be normal soon and you can resume your busy life.

Signed Cocoa"